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Wrinkles and Wild Adventures: Embracing the Chaos of Aging

Writer's picture: Sandy WrightSandy Wright

I total shifted my thinking when I realized that everyone from birth to death is in the aging process. It is an inevitable part of life, yet we start resisting it from an early age.  Face creams, botox, obsession with losing weight and on and on.  In a society that venerates youth, growing older can sometimes feel like a journey fraught with challenges.

 

Aging gracefully is totally possible with a dose of curiosity, humor and self-compassion. It involves embracing change, fueling wellness and cultivating a mindset that does not diminish wisdom and life experience but boldly celebrates it.  This also requires an open mind. Aging does not automatically imply wisdom. Sometimes, we can get stuck in a “knowing” mindset that separates our insight with a fear of being irrelevant. And then, who wants to tap into that!

 

I still think of myself as around 40, although it’s a playful game. Spirit, mind, insatiable exploration and much more keeps that true. The body sometimes talks a different language, but there are some ways to balance the inner conflict:

 

1)        Cultivating a positive mindset.  There are benefits – really there are. And gratitude for who we are, what we’ve experienced (and sometimes survived) throughout our life honors that gift. That’s true whether you’re 30 or 80 +.

2)        Embrace change as part of our life story….not easy, but as we say it’s a practice.

3)        Be patient with ourselves…a good dose of it as Kristin Neff, Ph.D writes in Fierce Self-Compassion (good book).

4)        Mental Fitness – Have you lost interest (at any age) in things you used to enjoy? What’s on your bucket list you’d like to still try? 90 year olds sky dive. 30 year olds learn to ride horses, 50 year olds run marathons and on and on…or simply try knitting or whatever floats your boat.

5)        Preventive Care – Our whole society is focuses on treating illness instead of preventing it. We chug vitamins (not a bad thing) but don’t exercise even if it is just walking the dog. We don’t schedule our annual whatevers to make sure we catch something early. And, too many of us still believe doctors are sent from God and don’t question or take control of our own health. 

6)        Keep connected to the people you love and maybe those you don’t know yet, but would like to. Invite a friend to dinner, make that call, write that text, build some new relationships.  The only consistent thing is changed. Some people are meant to be in our lives for a short time, others long-term. What can we learn from, give, receive from each person?

7)        Stay curious….for me, this is an essential step.  Once we stop being curious about people (not making up stories about them in our heads), lose the ability to realize we are still growing and changing (hmm “isn’t that interesting”) and just settle into what we think we know, we’re stagnant.  Aging gracefully goes right out the window.

8)        Tough one for many people I know – embrace technology. It isn’t going away (I say thank goodness). It’s a tool that can make life easier and, in many cases, more fun. It’s also a good way to connect with the younger set, fuel creativity, experiment, explore, express. What the hell, try it. You can always say no after that.

9)        Be Kind To Yourself – you’re all you got. Aging can bring on a sense of loss or obsolescence. Acknowledge your accomplishments, getting through hard times, fear of change, and that familiar “I’m old, I feel old, I am old” thoughts are not helpful. They aren’t fuel, they are a gauge on empty.  Fill yourself up with self-compassion.

 

Aging is all about nurturing your mind, body and spirit at any age. We are all on the same journey, some of us are just a little ahead in time.  Growing “seasoned” is a gift that many people don’t have. We have lost kids, young adults and many others to sickness, accidents and more.  Each moment is a gift – now go maverick and find your inner and outer wild adventures!

 

 



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